Movie Critics

Two movie critics (remember Siskel and Ebert?) compare notes on an invented movie. They illustrate their points by showing various scenes from the movie, which are played out by other performers.

Get a suggestion from the audience that gives you a movie, such as “the title of a movie that’s never been made.” Or ask for a well known movie and then offer the sequel.

Reviewers should start with a scene near the beginning of the movie, then jump to various pivotal scenes throughout the film, and finally the big ending. Of course, the critics are mainly there as a way to narrate us through a story.

After a brief introduction welcoming viewers to the show, our critics set up the first scene where we meet a main character.

PAUL: I loved the way this movie started. Let’s take a look at one of the opening scenes. James O’Finn is a farmer who is struggling to make ends meet. In this scene, he’s just discovered that the hailstorm that hit his farm has destroyed everything.

ERIC: It’s an amazing scene.

Eric and Paul look towards the stage where Iryna is frying food. James enters as the farmer. His head hangs low.

JAMES: It’s all been destroyed by hail. Everything! Six fields of corn, ruined.

IRYNA: But the cattle are OK…

JAMES: Dead! Every last one. Hail got ‘em, right between the eyes.

IRYNA: The chickens.

JAMES: Dead. Hit by hail as they were flying.

IRYNA: Chickens don’t fly.

JAMES: Not any more.

Our film critics, who narrate us quickly to a different point in the story. It’s tempting to deal with the events you’ve just seen, but better to make a big jump that assumes many other scenes have passed and throws the main character into a different location and different company.

ERIC: O’Finn is forced to move to the city in search of work. There he receives an strange offer of employment from a sinister figure.

Iryna changes characters, playing a sinister man.

IRYNA: It’s quite simple, Mr O’Finn. We need you to perform certain… services for us.

Some players get hung up on the fact that they are movie critics and try to offer analysis of the movies, but the critics are only a pretext for describing different parts of the story. If you are going to find fault with a part of the movie, move the action to a new scene.

ERIC: One of the most embarrassing parts of this horrible film was where O’Finn professes his love to his fiancée,

PAUL: I agree. I don’t know if it was the bad acting or the fact that both characters are wading, chest-deep through a swamp, but this was one of the least romantic romance scenes I’ve ever witnessed. Let’s take a look.

For the movie critics, this game gives practice in narrative. For the actors, it’s an opportunity to play big emotions.

Because it’s assumed that each scene is a pivotal one, they should avoid talk that isn’t important. (No “Hey, how’s it going?”) Instead, jump into the middle of a gripping scene.

JAMES: So this is what it’s come to. Murder! You’ve killed a man, Martinez, and now you’ve come here to kill the witnesses.

IRYNA: Hand over those documents, or the monkey gets it!

It should feel like a movie, with many locations and characters, and lively action. If two characters stay stuck in a barn for the whole story, something has probably gone wrong. Critics should pay special attention to character names because they’ll often have to refer to people by name.